Too tired to sleep.

Hey guys, I am sorry I haven't been around in a while. Lately I have thought things have gotten better, but they have done the inverse. As my life is now inverted. I have picked up a lot of responsibility, in an attempt to avoid my home life. Yet for some reason, it still feels so empty. I am basically between getting kicked out of my house, and choosing to move out. Which doesn't make sense to me (I'm not that horrible am I?). Needless to say this is a crossroads, and my hope is too one day move past these and move into what I was created to be...

Seven Years

Saosin wrote a song many years ago, I believe it was recorded in 2003, it is called Seven Years.

Here are the lyrics:

Taking on seven years

That holy ghost had left alone

Test my arms, kick like crazy

And I've been trying way too long

Only pushed away off to fight you

Now I'm sorry, I'm sorry I'm not sure

Getting off my chest,

the story ends

I would find a way without

(Tell him his eyes see too clear)

I would find a way without you

(Tell him his eyes see too clear)

That mistake was gold

And I know that without you

It's something that I could never do

That was why, staple the eyes and

Seven dates for me to sell machines

And tear on

Seven years you assured me

That I'd be fine if I complied

Only pushed away off to fight you

Now I'm sorry, I'm sorry I'm not sure

Getting off my chest, the story ends

I would find a way without

(Tell him his eyes see too clear)

I would find a way without you

(Tell him his eyes see too clear)

That mistake was gold

And I know that without you

It's something that I could never do

That was why Staple the eyes and

Seven dates for me to sell machines

And tear on

Sorry I'm Sorry, I'm sorry

Don't treat me, I'm to blame

Don't treat me like I ever accused you

I often question the meaning of these lyrics. I have heard endless interpretations. However I have decided I am going to apply it to my own life, regardless of what anyone thinks .

For me it would be a battle with my faith. I don't think that I have had it as bad as him, but he talks about testing his arms and kicking like crazy, to me that represents struggle. Almost like if you can't swim, you just flail around in the water in attempt to not drown(I had a near death experience in a lake). When he says he "Only pushed away off to fight you", to me that represents sin. When I am sin, I am usually relying on something other than God to help me stay afloat. Therefor I am pushing away from him, and fighting him.

"I would find a way without
(Tell him his eyes see too clear)
I would find a way without you
(Tell him his eyes see too clear)

That mistake was gold
And I know that without you
It's something that I could never do"

This part is interesting, because I see it as duality. There are times when I go from being self reliant and having all the answers, to being humble and saying I can't live without God.

"Sorry I'm Sorry, I'm sorry
Don't treat me, I'm to blame
Don't treat me like I ever accused you"

This part also has allot of the duality that I mentioned before. Self reliance verses Absolute dependency.

Ultimately I think we can all relate to this in one way or another.

With that said, I shall take my leave.

Cheers,

Collin

Coffee Anyone?

Interesting story, I am sitting here at Novo Coffee only to find myself sipping on a raspberry mocha, surrounded by some of my best friends, enjoying the dialogue happening between two older ladies, sitting only a couple of tables away from us. These ladies were talking about men that they have dated, or are dating(please keep in mind they are probably in their 60's). Sort of interesting hearing a couple of ladies such as themselves discussing such a thing.

Besides that, I always love coming to Novo, because I always find someone I know. Just today I moseyed my way into Novo with my close friend Chris, only to find some other great people; Sean, Lance, and Rachel sitting their doing homework, blogging, and learning Spanish. Shortly upon arriving, our friend Tommy trudged in, followed by Sammy Jo, Danielle, and Miles.
Funny how that works out =].

Well I shall leave you with the moral of this story...Always come into Novo with friends, especially when there are old ladies discussing dating.

Cheers,
Collin

Working at Waterworld....

For those who don't know, I am an employee of the fine company of waterworld. Now before I continue, let me answer the FAQ's
1) Can you get me in free?
A)If you like me enough to not get me fired, then no. However I can get a limited number of people in for 1/2 price.
2) Can you give me free stuff when you are working.
A) Refer back to the first part of the answer of question 2.
3) Do you plan on hooking up with any of the cute girls who come into the park?
A) We shall see what happens.

Now that we are through that lets get to the synopsis.
My favorite part about the job is that we get awesome blue short shorts. The not so great part is that those awesome blue short shorts have the netting that you would find in old fashioned swim trunks. You know the stuff that makes you chafe to the max.

Well, I shall continue this little post later. Because right now I have a celebration to attend.

Cheers.

This is what I'm about..

To start it off, I'm a 16 year old guy, looking for my chance to save the world. Needless to say this isn't an easy task. My plan is as follows: uniting the community by hanging out and talking, developing great lasting relationships with people, doing Wyldlife, so that middle schoolers can learn about who they are/were created to be, and teaching others how Jesus would do things with my actions and words.

The way I plan to accomplish these things is with art of music. Music has been a big part of my life, and I am positive it has been a huge part in others lives.

To sum this whole I want to be that guy who helps to bring life to the dead , I want to help plug people into the power source that we all have been separated from at one time or another. I want to make stone beat.

Thanks for reading,
Collin O'Toole